Preferring Some Children Over Others

Preferring Some Children Over Others


Question :

Is it allowed for a mother to treat one of her children or grandchildren more favorably than the others, even though they all treat her the same?


Answer:

The parent must treat them equally, without giving preference to any of them, neither in giving, spending money, or gifts. This is due to the saying of the Prophet ﷺ:
"Fear Allah and be just among your children."

He also said to a man, "Do you want them all to be equally dutiful to you; then distribute equitably among them."

The major scholars recommend one to be so equitable, that he greets them all and smiles in all of their faces in the same way, just to follow the command (in the previous Hadith). Some- times, though, it is allowed for the father to prefer a sick child or the youngest child, if the circumstance calls for extra love and care. But the general rule remains that the parents treat equally their children in all matters, especially if they are all equally dutiful and obedient.


Source:
Ibn Jibreen
Fatawa Islamiyah, Vol. 7 Page 336

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