It is Obligatory to Strive to Please One's Parents
Question :
My friend asks, "My mother is quick to become she supplicates often against myself and my brothers, especially when she is waking them up from sleep. She sometimes supplicates against me during the times when supplications are answered. I try to be dutiful to her, but her harshness sometimes pushes me to disobey her. Am I sinning, despite the fact that she is causing me to disobey her? And is a mother's prayer answered if she prays against her children without a reason to do so? May Allah reward you with goodness."
Answer:
It is obligatory upon children, both the males and females, to be kind and dutiful to their parents and to strive to avoid angering them and compelling them to supplicate against them. This is because the rights of parents are of great importance; Allah often orders us to fulfill these rights, as in His saying:
"And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents."
And He ﷺ said:
"And We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good to) his parents. His mother hore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years - give thanks to Me and to your parents unto Me is the final destination "
It is also confirmed that when the Prophet ﷺ was asked, "Which deed is best?" He answered,
"Prayer on time."
"Then what?"
"Dutifulness to parents."
"Then what?"
"Fighting in the way of Allah."
Such Hadiths about being dutiful to parents are many. It is obligatory for children, both the sons and daughters, to strive to be dutiful to their parents and to stay away from the causes that would lead to their anger. They are to listen and obey them in all good matters, and it is not allowed for them to disobey them, even if they receive harsh treatment from them.
At the same time, it is obligatory for parents to be gentle with their children, treating them kindly, in such a way as to prevent them from resorting to disobedience. Allâh Almighty said:
"Help you one another in Birr and Taqwaa (virtue, right- cousness, and piety); but do not help one another in sin and transgression. And fear Allah. Verily, Allah is severe in punishment."
Moreover, parents should supplicate on behalf of their children (for their guidance and well being), and not the opposite, particularly at those times when the prayer is more likely to be answered. And with Allah is the facilitation to do what is right.
Source:
Ibn Baz
Fatawa Islamiyah, Vol. 7 Pages 338-339-340